Where it all began...
becoming a mother is undeniably the most profound and TRANSFORMATIVE EXPERIENCE I have ever ENCOUNTERED in this lifetime. these boys, my PRECIOUS gifts have arrived not only to teach me INVALUABLE lessons but also to
Anoint me as their Guide-ess.
My journey began in 2009 with the birth of my eldest son, Luke, a turning point during my struggle with drug addiction and crippling fear. His arrival was a catalyst, drawing me back to my own sacred existence. As I stood at a crossroads between life and death, the profound decision to nurture and birth him marked the beginning of my personal rebirth.
This journey intensified with the unexpected natural pregnancy of quadruplets two years later—bringing a whirlwind of emotions and a relentless commitment to their safe delivery. Despite immense risks and continual advice from specialists to reconsider my pregnancy, a higher force (or inner voice) seemed to assure me that I must continue, as all would be well.
Listening to this guidance felt both empowering and terrifying, as I had never before sensed such a profound presence. Now, amidst labor at only 23 weeks, I faced the enormity of my decision. Medical interventions to stop my labor were successful and marked the beginning of a difficult time in hospital—a waiting game filled with milestones and deep inner reflection.
Weeks felt like months, and in those final days, prayer and trust became my solace. The sensation of eight tiny feet kicking was both exhausting and comforting, reminding me of the four souls that chose me as their mother.
Despite the challenges, Reuben, Zachary, Joshua, and Samuel were born on February 29th at 29 weeks. Witnessing their first breaths, I was overwhelmed by the miracle of birth and the resilience of the human body.
Reflecting on this profound experience, I am reminded of the deep, intrinsic power within us all—a sacred seed, whether in the form of new life or a creative endeavour, that awakens us to our higher selves.
My Journey of Remembrance...
My journey of remembrance began out of sheer necessity, four years after the birth of my quadruplets. I was overwhelmed with confusion, and my body was torn apart by illness. Confronted with this harsh reality, I faced a critical choice: surrender to the prescribed narrative of my life or seek an alternative path.
Until that pivotal moment, I had never envisioned anything beyond the scripted experience I believed was my life. I was unaware that I could control my health by addressing root causes rather than superficial solutions. The power to create and manifest my dreams and reality was hidden beneath layers of masks and limiting beliefs, while a profoundly whole, connected, and intuitive feminine force lay dormant within me.
I was merely existing, struggling both inside and out.
The turning point came in January 2016 when, in search of alternatives to pharmaceutical treatments for ongoing psoriasis and arthritis, I received the devastating diagnosis of cancerous cells in my womb. After three failed attempts to remove these cells from my cervix over the previous decade, the only proposed solution was a hysterectomy.
At that critical moment, I heard a voice similar to the one I had during my pregnancy. It was strong and clear, guiding me to find another way. This inner call resonated deeply within me, urging me to heal, love, and respect my body, and to remember who I was and why I had chosen this earthly existence. Declining the proposed medical intervention, I embarked on a profound journey of holistic and spiritual transformation.
From that point on, my journey of remembrance and healing unfolded with remarkable speed. Desperation met openness, leading me to explore concepts and ideas that once seemed 'far out.' As I immersed myself in these practices, I felt an increasing connection to my body, heart, and soul. Learning to care for and love myself in new ways made me feel truly alive.
Simultaneously, my marriage ended as our paths diverged. Despite acknowledging my healing journey, my partner chose a different road. Surrendering the outcome of our marriage to the Divine required immense courage, but it allowed me to trust in my ability to raise my five boys and to choose myself.
Following the end of my relationship, I embarked on an 18-month journey of celibacy, immersing myself in a daily routine of self-care. This period involved a profound return to my cyclical nature, aligning my body with the lunar cycles, and fostering a reconnection with Mother Nature. Every available moment was dedicated to self-love, enriching the bond I shared with myself.
The All Clear...
It was during this transformative phase that I stumbled upon an extraordinary teacher specialising in feminine reclamation and rewilding through a podcast.
Instantly drawn to her work, the goddesses, and the practices, I felt an unmistakable call to delve deeper. My exploration spanned a spectrum of practices, including shamanic, esoteric, and tantric traditions, all while immersing myself in the profound realm of Goddess work.
Driven by a deep soul yearning, I traveled from the UK to Colorado, eager to join her and other courageous women who had journeyed from afar. This experience was my first encounter with the genuine power of sacred women’s work, profoundly altering the course of my life.
In my unwavering commitment to peeling back layers, clearing painful distortions, and reconnecting with my innate body wisdom, I received a miraculous all-clear diagnosis after just six months—the cancerous cells had vanished entirely! This initiation into my Divine Feminine essence revealed a profound truth: it had always been within me. Though once unconsciously ignored and repressed due to external influences, I had learned to honour and tune back into her cycles, rhythms, and the profound gifts and lessons she offered at every turn. This journey was influential and life-changing, albeit tremendously painful.
Becoming aware of my tendency to live in my head, chasing success and financial gain, and understanding why I had lost touch with my feminine essence was a revelation. The distorted views of my body, womb, menstrual cycles, emotions, and wild nature, shaped by centuries of suppression and ancestral persecution for having healing gifts, fuelled my journey. Addressing these blocked, shamed, judged, and repressed aspects of myself required surrendering to the darkness. Yet each time,
I emerged freer, wiser, more trusting, and in tune with myself and my intuition.
Enter The Priestess...
Following the threads of this newfound inner wisdom I embarked on a deep exploration of my sexuality to understand how it might have been the catalyst for my womb health issues.
It was an exploration that shaped the very essence of my being.
At the core of my existence, sexuality and sexual expression have always held immense importance—an archetype of my soul, if you will. Yet, until my early thirties, it was a path marked by complex and challenging experiences.
Reflecting on my past, I confronted the impact of my journey through unhealthy sexual expressions—experiences that included prostitution, BDSM, kink, and open marriages. These were not merely pursuits of pleasure but manifestations of a deep need for acceptance and validation. I had been seeking to fill a void, finding solace in encounters with both men and women.
My entry into prostitution marked a pivotal moment, born out of a toxic relationship and the period I hinted at earlier, when I was deeply struggling with drug addiction. The culmination of my unconscious exploration was a traumatic experience on my 27th birthday—a carjacking and sexual assault that cast a long shadow over my past, intensifying the complexities of my choices and unhealthy expressions.
This traumatic event became a pivotal point, a moment of reckoning that forced me to confront the depths of my vulnerabilities that had led me to that dark place.
My journey took an unexpected turn as I sought healing and understanding of my shadows. In my quest for self-discovery and empowerment, a series of divine connections led me straight to the doors of Amrita Grace and the Sacred Feminine Mystery School. She was just about to begin her training of the first cohort of Spiritual Sexual Educators and I knew within every cell of my being I needed to embark on this certification journey, aspiring to guide and support others who, like me, had faced traumas and challenges around sexuality.
Through Amrita’s teachings, I experienced profound integration between my past and the empowered healer I was becoming. The certification process was more than formal education; it was a revelation of the sacred feminine mysteries, weaving a tapestry that connected my personal journey with universal truths.
I awakened to an embodied sense, that true acceptance and validation must emanate from within, not be sought in the arms of others.
The distorted expressions of my sexuality served as a mirror, reflecting the internal struggles and yearnings that needed attention and healing. In facing these complexities head-on, I embarked on a path of growth, reclaiming the authenticity of my sexual identity.
Today, as I navigate the sacred realm of sexual healing, I carry the scars and lessons of my past. What began as a personal journey of healing and awakening has transformed into a lifelong dedication. Through integrating my experiences, I was able to step forward to share the truth of the feminine mysteries, activating the long forgotten path within women.
The Dragon Rose Temple was birthed from this place, as a living testament to the resilience of the human spirit. The shadows of my journey have transformed into beacons of light, opening doors for women to reconnect with their essence, explore, unlock, and express their fullness. Awakening sacred gifts, passions, and purpose while healing wounds, self-limiting beliefs, and health problems.
The Initiation Continues...
For just over a year, I immersed myself in Sacred Sexual Awakening and Healing, sharing these transformative gifts through workshops and in-person healing sessions. The response from those who journeyed with me was nothing short of profound.
My training had guided me to embrace the theoretical concepts of sexuality as a powerful force for healing, awakening, and creative abundance. Yet, it was in the actual practice—guiding both men and women through unlocking their sexual energy, dismantling blocks, and tapping into their innate power—that these theories came alive. The transformations I witnessed in their lives were living testaments to the truth I had come to embody. This journey not only left a lasting impact on those I worked with but also ignited a profound transformation in how I showed up in the world and the magical paths that began to unfold before me.
Every twist and turn felt like an orchestration in harmony with the Divine will of my unique journey. However, as the dawn of 2020 brought forth the pandemic, I found myself drawn into a cocoon. It was a time when I needed to step away from my work and hibernate alongside the rest of the world. My days were consumed with homeschooling my boys and sitting in the silence amidst the global grief and decay.
This period took a toll on me—mentally, emotionally, and spiritually—plunging me into a deep, dark night of the soul. Struggling to support my family both financially and physically, the weight of isolation and fear eroded my capacity to fully engage with the world.
Enter Daniel Sowleu, a pioneer in the realm of Primal Experiential Therapeutic Astrology. I had the privilege of being Daniel’s client for 18 transformative months before this, immersing myself in the dynamic realm of the astrological medicine wheel. Together, we delved into the depths of my unconscious, weaving together fragmented aspects of my soul to achieve wholeness and integration.
I experienced profound shifts in my life through working with Daniel, so when he invited me, during the depths of my underworld journey, to join his Goddess Asteroids Masterclass and intimately learn about the archetypes and patterns of the feminine in our birth charts, I jumped at the chance.
This experience became my guiding light, leading me out of the darkness and empowering me to fully embrace my sovereignty and strength. It became clear that this work was a destined tool, a missing link essential for evolving and supporting my mission of sexual healing and empowerment for humanity.
In 2021, I committed to a year-long certification program, completing it with a newfound sense of purpose and presence in the world. As the world began to open up again after the pandemic, I stepped forward once more, sharing monthly gatherings, conducting workshops, and offering private healing sessions for clients not only in the UK but across the globe.
Coming Home...
In 2022, the universe brought forth the incredible presence of my beloved, who gracefully stepped into my world, embracing the wild and magical journey of raising my five boys. Together, we envisioned a future where we could live in harmony with the earth, surrounded by love and freedom. Our dream was to create a space where our children and humanity could thrive, embracing their sovereignty and dharma.
We understood that we were the architects of this reality, and the journey began within ourselves.
Our shared vision was of a home where we could unfold into our truth, realise our full potential, and cultivate a sacred and nurturing environment for others. For more than a year, we sought this vision in the UK, exploring various paths guided by our intuition. However, none of the doors seemed to open.
It wasn’t until our trip back to my homeland, South Africa, in early 2023 that the path became clear. Kuthumba, an Eco Village nestled in the enchanting Tsitsikamma forest along the Garden Route, called to us. Here, we felt a profound peace and a magnetic connection to the land, discovering a property that embodied everything we had been seeking.
Relocating with our family 6 months later, we have spent the past year on a wild African adventure. And yet, our time here will soon be coming to an end, filled with deep learnings, newfound clarity, and truth. This experience has opened the door in the most magnificent way to coming home to the Wild, Wise Feminine Within. The Goddess has a magical way of guiding you to exactly where you need to be, when you need to be there, to learn what you need to learn. I’ve realised that coming home isn’t about finding a place outside of ourselves; it’s about discovering that home is always within.
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